Mr. Smut

Image: Bharath Kumar (bharathkumar27@gmail.com)

The cockroach crept into the basin hole. The slush in the tube made the cockroach’s ride home a smooth slide. “Ah! What a ride back home, the only part in my life that I enjoy” thought the cockroach. Mr. Smut was very proud of his home. His home was as neat as a new pin. Well, he liked being in filth the whole day but loved spending his night in a fresh corner. His leftover dinner was done and it was time for a mighty slumber. His legs were tired of running. He had to run every day to save his life. “Why do the giant brothers and sisters hate me so much? I don’t hurt them. I try my best to stay away from them. It is the filth that attracts me so much. Why don’t they clear the filth rather than trying to kill me? Am I so evil? May be I am ugly. But I clean myself everyday and try my best to look good. What more can I do?” wondered Mr. Smut. These haunting thoughts always bothered him and he would end up staying up late at nights. It hurt him so much that night and he decided to travel with Mr. Smith, his giant brother, with whom he shared his home. He thought “May be living their life a day will make me a better friendly cockroach”. Mr. Smut slept well and the next day he found his way to the cosy coat pocket of Mr. Smith.

It was a typical day for Mr. Smith. The alarm blew off at 7:00am. He lifted his grogginess with great effort and crawled to his bathroom. Mr. Smut was as fresh as a daisy and was peeping from Mr. Smith’s coat pocket. He was all excited about his day off. He wondered why Mr. Smith looked so tired and dull. He waited and wondered again looking at Mr. Smith. “How did he manage to look so handsome? He just went into that room and he looks like a changed man now! His hair looks so fine and his body smells so nice that I cannot go near him. No wonder he hates me. But wait, I am clean too!” thought Mr. Smut with utmost shock. He kept staring at the way Mr. Smith was getting ready. He found many things in common. He felt that he was as clean as Mr. Smith. He felt that both of them had food very fast. He felt both of them were unsure about how they looked as he witnessed the long-time affair between Mr. Smith and the Mirror. In a jiffy Mr. Smut found himself enjoying a smooth slide. Just that this time he was in a car and Mr. Smith was racing against many other cars. Seldom did he understand that Mr. Smith was racing against time as he was getting late to his appraisal meeting. “Damn!” yelled Mr. Smith, “I am late, AGAIN!”. He was sweating profusely and he was tired already. Mr. Smut felt bad for him and thought “Do we have that room here? He can just go in and come out fresh!”

Mr. Grunt was twiddling with his mobile phone and losing his patience looking at the time. Mr. Smith rushed into the meeting room. “Good morning Mr. Grunt, sorry I got st...” “Oh please!” grumbled Mr. Grunt and continued “You knew it was your appraisal meeting today and of all days you think of giving me excuses today? Just sit down”. Mr. Smut did not understand the situation but did realise that it was not good and continued peeping. He saw an unfinished piece of cheese burger next to Mr. Grunt and was too tempted to jump out but didn't want to take a big risk of getting killed easily. It tempted him even more when he saw the burger thrown in the trash. “Let me just peep” sighed Mr. Smut. The meeting went on for hours. Mr. Smut heard pleads, silence, shouts, blah and more blah. After the meeting Mr. Smith was silent throughout the day. Finally, Mr. Smut found himself enjoying a smooth slide again. This time with a voice that put him to sleep. The radio was playing old melodies which silenced the noise of the bustle.

“Why do the bosses hate me so much? I don’t hurt them. I try my best to stay away from them. I just want to earn some money and worth. Why don’t they clear the prejudices rather than trying to kill me? Am I so evil? May be I am ugly. But I clean myself everyday and try my best to look good. What more can I do?” shouted Mr. Smith. Disappointed, he went to the basin to clean his hands and reached his coat’s pocket to take his handkerchief out. “Yikes! What the heck” gasped Mr. Smith and Mr. Smut fell into the basin. Before Mr. Smith could smash him he found his way through the basin hole. “Wish I could live a cockroach’s life, I wouldn't have to run and fret so much” shouted Mr. Smith. “My life is so similar to yours. Both of us live in filth and are constantly afraid of being killed” snapped Mr. Smut and slid to his home.

Both of them got away from each other and chanted “Home Sweet Home”